It was Penn's homecoming, so a lot of my friends were gathering from around the country for a weekend of celebration and debauchery. I knew it was inevitable that I would run into the ex....as I've said PLENTY of times before, we have many of the same friends.
Instead of going through the whole story, I'm going to give you a list of "do"s and "don't"s for seeing your ex for the first time. I will not specify why I've come up with these things, but you can figure it out...
1. DO look AMAZE.
2. DO sip on some liquid courage. Sorry, but it does make things easier....
3. DON'T get too drunk and ask him about his masturbation habits......yeah......seriously....
4. DO tell him how great you're doing.
5. DON'T insult him.
6. DON'T try to go home with him. I PROMISE I DIDN'T DO THIS! Just thought it was probably worth mentioning.
7. And finally.... DO depend on your friends. Shout out to my girl A. Norb for sticking by me. This is what friendship looks like...I leave you with this gem.
And...NO...I'm not glaring at him. I really don't know what I'm glaring at, but it was not him.
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